The Mystery of Attraction
One Wink’d friend spent a summer at a yoga retreat in India. Every morning she would tuck into the quiet meditation of a yoga room. Fifteen other students were there with her.
One of them was gorgeous: blonde hair, caramel skin, flexible in all sorts of interesting ways.
“But we never talked,” she told us. “I had the opportunity plenty of times. I just never wanted to.”
“He was more attractive that way, disconnected from reality.”
That got us at Wink’d wondering: What creates attraction?
Why do we notice some people and not others? What makes us pause and think, linger for that extra sip of coffee, find another way to glance over from under the cover of a newspaper?
Why do we want to pass on over a Wink’d card to one person and not someone else?
Now isn’t that a fun question…
Fortunately, we’re not the only ones trying to solve the mystery of attraction this week.
Kat over at Katrichterwrites mused on the importance of height in attractiveness. Having been sent a series of shorter men via an online dating service, Kat blogged about her frustration.
“I have always been shallow when it comes to my taller-than-me-in-heels requirement,” she wrote.
Researchers have shown that in large groups, the first thing used to narrow down potential partners is appearance. Even when men or women ranked certain traits previously (intelligence, motivation, love of salsa dancing), as numbers of potential partners increased, the importance of non-physical traits decreased.
Yet basing attractiveness on looks alone can be dangerous for unexpected reasons, another article published this week suggests. Apparently, when a woman is more attractive than her man, the relationship tends to end poorly and quickly.
And when the man is more attractive? The relationship keeps going along just fine.
Maybe the secret to attraction is just having fewer choices. A British study recently showed that when speed daters had more options, they found less love. Fewer choices amounted in better results.
Guess there can be too much of a good thing.
“For me,” explained one strapping Wink’d friend, “I notice girls who laugh a lot. I like that humour. I like when they’re playful.”
What about you? What do you think? We’re curious. Is it physical? A voice, a laugh, a way of dressing? Tell us what makes you attracted to someone in the comments below. Don’t be shy.
We like confidence. And beautiful yoga gurus.